Micah King
From St John the Baptist
21 July 2009 - 10:42pm
I don't mean to sound like a bleeding heart or an advert from Soul Searchers but what do you do when you feel your relationship with God is going downhill and you don't have a particuarly strong church base to turn to? We've only recieved a new vicar a few months ago who I don't really know and I don't have a very strong network of people I can turn to from within the church for support. Worship and reading the bible don't seem to be helping anymore and prayer doesn't seem to do much more either. Can anyone offer any advice?
Neil_M
From York Elim
22 July 2009 - 10:48am
Persistence and honesty. By that I mean just keepy trying, and don't try to kid yourself. The Bible tells us that if we draw near to God, He will draw near to us. As you pray, just tell Him you're struggling. He knows anyway, so you may as well tell Him!
I'm sure that the hard bit will be getting motivated to pray in the first place, and the last thing you need to hear is "but you need to make time". So I'd say just do what you can. I'd suggest reading the book of Habakkuk; it's quite short and offers great encouragement. You could also try Lamentations, and certain portions of Isaiah and Jeremiah. The fact that these books are in the Bible are encouragement to me in situations like this - God knows that we will have 'wilderness experiences' and hs provided us with written encouragement for such times!!
Saw this old thread and wondered Micah if, looking back, you can shed some light on where that time of distance led to? Does hindsight teach us anything that would comfort others in the same boat?
..
The honest answer buddy, is I still do feel distant quite a lot. My situation hasn't improved that much. My church has gotten less supportive not more while other things have gotten in the way and philosophy lectures begin to make myself doubt at times... it's not great
Dont listen to the enemys lies keep praying singing praying those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength
Hey Micah,
That's a really tough place to be in. I know how discouraging that is. There's not an easy answer - often praying and reading the Bible is the last thing that you want to God seems distant.
Reading the Bible and praying are really important, but what will also help is getting some good people around you. Try and find someone at church you trust that can talk with and who can pray for you. The vicar should be able to help even if you don't know him well - that's part of his job! You might need to make the first move towards people, which can be a scary and humbling thing to do. But Christian life is supposed to be a community life, although sadly many churches aren't that great at the community bit of it. I'll pray that you have the courage to speak to someone at church, and that someone will come along side you.
David Mandeville
From Judah Tribe Ministries, Jacksonville, Florida, USA
26 January 2010 - 5:01pm
Surrounding yourself with what my pastor calls "Godly things" like worship music in my ipod and on the car radio helps me when I'm feeling that way. Don't forget though that faith is not just emotion, you know the truth, that "He will never forsake you or leave you". Keep your faith, God will honor that.
Blessings,
David
It's a pity that you feel there's a lack of support from your church on this front. Sometimes this is when we realise that church is more than the building or the regular faces: it's also our closest friends or family members, classmates who can support us in this way. Perhaps you could draw it to your pastor's attention so that they can consider offering a ministry to people feeling a bit cut-off, or perhaps there is one there that is just really poorly advertised (they'd still benefit from a wake-up call on that front).
You have my sympathies as a fellow philosophy student :X but reflection can be a great help, think to yourself: what are the things that are getting in the way, why? Is it a real distance or a felt one? Is it one that would be helped by solitude or exaggerated by it? Would you say you have someone who gives spiritual guidance, who knows you?
Godly things might help to a certain extent, but God Himself would be best. We can try and create an environment of intimacy or closeness through our songs or routines/prayer-space but ultimately we need to make ourselves present to Him.
Hope that doesn't sound preachy, cos it's just based on my own past experience and reflection so if any helps then all good - if not, then let it fall to the ground.
I always find 1 Cor 10:13 encouraging:
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
Hey Guys
When I was prompted out of the blue this morning to repost on this age old forum I had no idea how muh unexpected support I'd recieve. Thank you one and all who took time to write back to me. All of your suggestions seem amazing but... and please don't think me conceited, I feel like I've done most of those things and they still don't seem to be helping.
Lots of you guys talked about Worship, both through singing and praying. Well there's a massive and unresovlable dilemma in my church. 95% of my congregation are traditional, elderly anglican with a fierce dissaproval of contemporary worship music and dispite letters, meetings, worship training days, my church's attempts to bring contemporary worship music (which I can relate to) into my church have all failed. I tried to counter this a few months ago by leading a worship session every wednesday at my college's Christian Union in an attempt to worship there, but the songs seem musical full but spiritually empty. I havn't felt God through worship in a long time. I also find prayer empty and useless like I'm talking to a wall. I don't doubt that He can hear me but I can't hear a thing in return. So Worship and Prayer seem like futile pursuits.
Paul you suggested reading the bible. At Christmas I brought Rick Warren's Bible Study Methods and once a week I have been studying the bible using this guide on top of my normal one chapter a night routine. The latter I have been doing for almost two years now and I have read almost 2/3rds of the bible but I gain very little from it because it feels like a chore and not a spiritual experience. The other bible study, while more interesting, scares me. Rick opens his guide with the words:
'If you are not planning on applying the lessons you recieve from your Bible study, it would be better for you to not study the bible at all! You will just be heaping more judgement on yourself!'
I have to confess I'm scared of finding something that I won't be able to commit to. I'll be brave and confess on this forum, I'm concerned what I may find about the sex before marriage issue because I know that if I find what I fear I'll find I won't be able to apply it to my life and that will make God even more distant from me than I feel already. I'm due to do a bible study tommorow but I'm childishly scared to conduct it... I don't know what to do on that one.
You also suggested I talk to someone at my church, either my vicar or a close friend. Well, while I know my vicar fairly well, he is not someone I feel comfortable around nor someone who I want to confide in because he has been very resistent to introducing worship into my church and his views are very traditional and I do not think we relate well together. Alternativly I'd go to another member of the youth in my church, except there is no youth at my church any more. They've nearly all left because of it's failure to provide for us. There are no sunday schools for our age group, no services appropriate for us, and while they started a cell group for the 6 remaining youth, it already feels disjointed and likely to fail.
I also try to surround myself with Godly things. I listen to worship music on my iPod frequently but that does not enable me to worship nor feel close to God. Equally, playing worship songs on the guitar and piano has the same result. Even worship events such as Soul Survivor and Worship Central seem to have little impact on my spiritual life...
I hope I addressed most of your suggestions, because I really do appriciate you taking the time to help me. That's why I've tried to be as honest as possible to you. I hope that maybe something postive might come out of this confession of mine. I really hope so.
:-(
David Mandeville
From Judah Tribe Ministries, Jacksonville, Florida, USA
26 January 2010 - 6:31pm
Micah,
I pray that you can hold on through what you are experiencing. It will be worth it if you can. I myself walked away from the Lord for nearly 30 years. My parents had taken me to church every time the doors were open for my entire life and when I was 18 I left the church. I admire young people that can hold onto their faith today, the world is tugging so hard in the other direction. By your posts I can tell that you are holding on with all you've got. Keep hanging in there.
David
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