glasshound
From Christ Church Cathedral
26 April 2009 - 11:18am
First posting, so here goes..
This song started with the opening chord sequence/rhythm, and kind of flowed from there.
I record on a Boss/Roland BR600 unit, with an AT2020 condensor mike and direct plugin for guitar and bass. Likely there are improvements in my recording technique, (not even mentioning mixing). Pretty much anything you wish to comment on is ok with me.
I'm on our church's worship group (vocals, guitar) and some of my songs are used in worship. I would like to see the ones that our congregation respond to have a wider audience, but I'm not sure how to go about that process. Maybe someone can give me some ideas that they've had success with?
Thanks for listening, and your honest feedback!
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Roger
From CRBC Ipswich
26 April 2009 - 2:41pm
Hi there - and welcome!
Well done - for writing and recording it, and for placing it here for potential refining!
It sounds a cheerful song .... and you can't beat a good bit of rhythmic clapping in worship!
Any chance you could put the lyrics on here? There's a lot of them, and it would be nice to have a good look at them.
God bless
Roger
Here are the lyrics to the song. I will post lyrics for any future songs. :<)
Chorus:
I will sing of the love of God Our Father
Sing of Christ Jesus, His one son
Sing of the Holy Spirit,
I will sing
I will shout out my praise of all Your glory
Marvel at all the works You've done
Pray that Your love shines through me
I will sing, I will sing
Verse1
Resting in Your gentle arms, I'm safe within Your love
Ever faithful, ever loving, Rock of Ages, mine
Slow in anger, great in mercy, I trust in You alone
Following Your path before me, Lord
Chorus
Verse2
Stand before me in my journey, guide me on my way
Light eternal, shine so brightly, I will never stray
Let Your Word be strength and comfort, never failing shield
Only to You God, alone I'll yield
Chorus
I will sing of the love of God Our Father
Sing of Christ Jesus, His one sone
Sing of the Holy Spirit,
I will sing... Yeah!
I will shout out my praise of all Your glory
Marvel at all the works You've done
Pray that Your love shines through me
I will sing, I will sing, I will sing, I will sing
hi grasshound,
good song idea here thanks for sharing.
i like the upbeat feel of the song.
the fist thing that strikes me is that this is a quite a mouthful to sing. there seem to be a bit too many words in the chorus in particular. if you cut the words down making the chorus more simple i think it would be more accessible for the average church goer to pick up.
also the tenses change in the chorus from singing about God 'his' to directly to God 'you'. it would be stronger if it was all directly to God i think.
im not sure the word 'mine' is that smooth a lyric at the moment. it seems a bit awkward to me. any way of trying another word/words there?
also just a challenge, so please dont think im being rude, but why do you want your songs to get a wider audience?
God bless,
gav.
Thanks for the comments, Gav. All valid points. The tense/viewpoint change is a weakness I have to pay attention to more.
Wider audience question .. some of my songs our group plays in our worship have received positive comments from people whose opinions I value. My wife points out weaknesses in melody, lyrics, etc, helping me in working more on the craft of songwriting. She also tells me that some of my songs are as good as those of other writers we sing in church now. I would like the best of those songs to go beyond our church. A part of that desire is personal satisfaction/validation of course, but I have come to accept that I have a God-given talent that should not be a light hid under a bushel simply because of personal fear of disappointment, or laziness, etc. (Hope that doesn't come across as hubris.)
Thanks again for your comments. I'll post another song in a week or two.
Hi mate
I would suggest using a click track in furtue :-). If you listen to the first chorus and then skip to the last the tempo is majorly speeded up, not slightly but majorly lol.
You must have been exhausted after that
Good vibe to the song though, i agree with gavin its seem alot of lyrics maybe you could simplify the chours?
God bless you
oh btw you have EQ'd a nice souding acoustic weldone.
And compliments to the bass player cool rift!!!
A click track - I'll have to check my BR600 and see what it can provide. I do have a tendency to speed up as I play through a song - probably why I'm not a drummer....
Glad you liked the bass (especially since it was me ... {:
yeh its natural to speed up i do it too.
i hate using a click but it a good foundation to build a song on :) it also means if u want to add midi drums it will be in time
I love the upbeat melody and the positive message, Lord knows we need some in the present state of our society. The speed-thing gets me to. One method that works for me is the good old foot tap. It's silent and forces me to concentrate on my timing. I'm not a master of it, however, I've noticed improvement. Since I'm dabble in acapella recordings and am "The Am---aaa-tttt---uuuu-rrrr--eeee I go for the basics.
Thanks for sharing.
thanks for your thoughts grasshound.
i would challenge you on the wider audience thing to leave it up to God. by all means dont hide your light under a bush, but it might be his will for your songs to only ever serve your church and not a wider audience. is that a bad thing? not at all.
keep writing songs for your church and trust God with where there go.
God bless,
gav.
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