Marc Proctor
From New Hope Church
19 February 2010 - 5:48pm
Revised the chorus a bit. The words "know" and "find" kind of get jumbled in the recording; I think I'll just use "know"
I also think I'll rename it "Shadow of the Cross" to fit the opening line of the chorus. So the old one is "His Cross" and the revised is "Shadow of the Cross".
Any thoughts?
Such wrath, met justice when God's love met the glorious cross
where the king of glory, hung by the hands holding the heavens above
before a love so great, in such mercy and grace I'm undone, I'm undone
in the shadow of the cross,
I'll humbly lay my life
To know the beauty in love's sacrifice
In the shadow of the cross
Ill die and find new (true) life
to know the beauty in loves sacrifice
amidst all our weakness, the cross stands stronger than all we could lack
to our death, it's new life, from our dust it builds beautiful hope
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Wayne Sanders
From C3 (Cambridge Community Church)
20 February 2010 - 1:01am
Hey Marc (my cross composition compadre)
Nice one mate. The cross is always a good topic to write about - kinda central to what we believe so I guess that makes it pretty important.
Particularly like the verses. Could you work in another verse before you go to the pre-chorus though? Just a though - almost feels like the pre-CH comes in a little too soon. Also - could the melody line perhaps go up on the word "grace" in the pre-CH? Chorus is pretty catchy although it felt a little "cramped" as in - a lot of words to fit in. One suggestion would be to sing only the first 3 lines of the chorus and then in the repeat chorus replace the second line "I'll humbly lay my life" with the 4th line "I'll die and find new life" So the chorus would read:
in the shadow of the cross,
I'll humbly lay my life
before the glorious cross
in the shadow of the cross,
I'll die and find new life
before the glorious cross
I think that way it would give the song some breathing space at that point.
Just a thought. Nice one though mate. Keep writing
Blessings
Wayne
Really like this song. Its brilliant.
Well done!
I like what Wayne has suggested about the chorus; you should give that a try :)
Good song though; well done :D
Thanks guys! I wouldn't have posted it if I wasn't planning on altering it still, so I'll give it a shot! I think I rushed it a bit.... cutting 5 bpm's may give some more room too. I'll post this one again.
Mostly just changed the chorus, I was playing with the pre-chorus a lot and had trouble. Maybe I just don't have the "pipes" for it, but when the melody started crawling up at "grace" it felt like it should keep going up and I'd often find myself in deep water! But, I'll readily admit that writing strong melody lines are my weakness.
Hey Marc
great song :) really strong lyrics - in particular the last verse and the undone bit is really 'real'.
really nice melody aswell.
Nathan
Thanks Nathan! I'm glad you feel it is moving along. I think this one is about to that place where it is pretty much done, just needs some tweaking for flow and such. Thanks again!
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